6 months of planning and we are finally making the Move.
Back story already?
Promise it’ll be quick: Last September (2020) and suffering from COVID Cookiness (the next step after COVID Cooped-up-to-Here), my husband and I decided we needed a change. A Big Change. After countless hours discussing all emotional and logistical details, we were in agreement and decided to move by the first week in March. We drew pros/cons charts, categorical to-do lists, and navigated emotional roller coasters. We decided to temporarily rent our Philly house for a year, and are renting in hotter-than-hell Burbank, CA. But after this Winter, hotter than hell sounds like heaven about now.
I’ve actually learned quite a bit about myself in this process. I highly recommend moving cross-country with 2 cats for someone who is searching for something akin to an electric shock from their present day-to-day routine. With so many things up in the air (coaching practice, part-time job ending December 31, the move, etc) I was making myself crazy. I eventually termed this state my Trifecta. And this Trifecta was stressing me out to the max.
I was having an extremely hard time deciding which of these 3 to focus on. I felt out of control and extremely scatter-brained. Because of the holidays, the weather, and my unrelenting Trifecta, I started to go down that very dangerous path of my weeds. I know me and my weeds, and my weeds are not my friends. Through some wonderful coaching I took charge over my anxiety and began to see clearly what I should be focusing on and what my next steps would be.
Universe, meet Debbie. Debbie, Universe.
By February, things had fallen into place and I accepted the situation by strongly holding onto the belief that the Universe will tell me what to do. Yes, a bit woo-woo, but it’s true! This acceptance helped me to let go of things that were out of my hands. I had confidence that the answer would present itself, and was prepared for whichever way it would turn out. Sure, I’d be disappointed if the move didn’t work out. But, there was no sense being stressed over something I could not control. If this move wasn’t the answer, then there would be an alternate answer.
We lived every day by the Bible, I mean our To-Do list. Satisfied, I could see the red cross outs almost every day. Meanwhile, the house is spotless, is in move-in, turn-key condition, and I even broke open a wall for an open-concept kitchen! (Just kidding, all you HGTV fans. Unfortunately, the same old wall still stands.) I’ve lived in this house for almost 19 years, filled with 19 years of stuff. And it takes almost 19 years to get rid of all that stuff. Well, so it felt.
I could sense the momentum toward the eventual move as everything was falling into place until there was one setback. We quickly learned that the rental market was extremely competitive – you had to jump on it if you were remotely interested. (Apparently we weren’t the only ones with COVID fever.) Plus, no one could be bothered with virtual tours just for us out-of-towners. We were getting nowhere and my emotions were crushed again. Our March deadline was approaching fast. What if we just can’t find a place? Maybe this was the message we were getting from the Universe. Stop looking; don’t move… but why?
As they say, when you hit a brick wall, go around it.
You know when you keep doing the same thing over and over and you keep getting pushed back? If this one path keeps getting rejected, there are other alternatives and back doors toward your eventual goal. When I realized that and opened up to other areas in the search, this perfect little house appeared with nearly everything we were looking for. Sure, we’re giving up some things – it’s old and not recently updated, there’s only one bathroom, and we’re about 25 years older than someone who would buy this cute starter home. But, it didn’t matter. It has beauty. A backyard with a lemon tree. And a fireplace! This city girl now craves suburbia. Who knew?
The Universe announced loud and clear: It’s the right time and the right choice. Bon voyage.
And so… we’re leaving in 3 days. 2 adults/2 cats and a super supply of catnip.
I feel I am now an expert on moving, purging, organizing, and deciding, and I would love to share my tips to any one of you who are going through this or have a similar situation and need a block-crusher. Just fill out the form on Secondhalftransitions.com and we’ll see how we can work together.
When you are having trouble deciding what to do, or what your next step is, try opening up to your Universe. It may strike you with an electrical shock, just as it did for me.